PENT UP.

September 2004, My sister advised me to tuck my heart so deep within that only whoever I marry would figure out where the hell it was.

Of course I didn’t listen.

Whether, however, I would’ve done anything different if I had another go at things, I’m not entirely sure. What’s Life without the learning curve aye?

Grudges accumulated from past fuck up-ers deny our hearts (and minds) plenty of good emotions.

But that’s where we’re all at. Well at least most of us.

If I had to point a finger, I’d blame Sex.

Sex really was meant for marriage.

Folks, teachers and men of the cloth told this to us growing up, but maybe they didn’t quite know how to, because we didn’t listen. Look where that got us. Hearts are hurt, babies get babies, and worse still, we’re forced into situations where we find out that the I Love You he said was either not as genuine, or he isn’t brave enough to back it up with deeds.

Scary thing about the times we live in, by the time a lady is at the altar saying I Do, she’s cried over a man, looked through another man’s phone, slapped yet another man, and woken up next to another after a night out. These are what,  four men? And the number Four here could very well mean One with whom she’s shared all these experiences with, or it could represent Twenty, each falling into either one of the four categories.

With each instance of these four experiences, one loses a part of their heart. That is probably why if you hurt her the first time, she’ll cry for longer than she will the next time you do the same thing. Now picture how many times that happens in one relation. Well? Extrapolate that; up until the day she says I Do.

(Let it be known that I find it easier to use A Girl as an example because they are more honest, and more raw with their show of emotion. This easily applies to both sexes).

One of my comrades-at-blog holds the opinion that one of the most important ways to keep a relationship working is to be friends with your partner. Hell-a-true.

But my cosign to that sentiment goes only so far.

Relations(hips) were probably invented to replace friends(hips).

When the two meet, a rain-check means nothing. A joke can be made during a drink up with both and their sets of friends and it will not be up for dissection in camera. What then changes with time? Sex. The more the two have sex, the more they give their privacy up. The more vulnerable they become. The more they break their walls down.

This is with regard to one relation. Now picture two, three relations that in all honesty, go pretty much the same way.

Where does all this leave us in the end.

A generation of jaded humans.

A generation of 65kg’d humans carrying 100kg’d baggage.

A generation of humans with Pent up Hurt.

A generation. My generation.